I feel myself burn
The pain lasts but a second
Transported to a place
Where there was no more anguish or heartache
A place so peaceful and yet it doesn't last
But a short time it does
I can feel the cocoon encasing me as I try to break free
And then poof… I did
Growth is fast as I re-incarnate into…me
Stronger than before, more powerful than before.
The first time was a long time ago
Where violations weakened me
Made me sink to depths of despair.
The burning as I burst into flames but only for a short time,
Then from the ash I rose
Then came life's tribulations
Causing me much anguish and pain
More than I could bear
In the deep abyss I fell
Wanting to embrace the darkness
And the darkness to embrace me
Then again I again re-incarnate into me…
Stronger, more powerful than before
As I rise from the ashy remains of my past self
I become me
Who I want to be
I am living stronger and more powerful than I ever lived before
And I know that I shall rise yet again if I should burn.
My reincarnation is sure, because I AM PHOENIX…immortal!
As my soul looks down at me in that moment…!
Reincarnating into self
Stronger and stronger the ash revives
From a place of pain and sorrow
Violations and manipulations
Sank beneath the ash
Somewhere in the midst an ember ignites
It burns with determined glow
Finding the strength on which to survive
Grasping for a log in which to light
Heart ache and anguish took her first life
Somehow she rose again to thrive
Life then took another death blow
Again she sank into oblivion
Grasping and reaching she found a new grip
On life she tries to hold
Then again dreams are shattered
Life grows cold
Somewhere in the dust
Life is a must
That one ember ignites
To give her life …once more
As phoenix rise
And leaves the ash behind
About this poem…
I have had a life that has been wrought with turmoil, anguish, pain and despair but over time, I would rise out of that dark place and find peace again. This time I feel that I have been healed completely, because for the first time in years I actually do not feel that sense of looming doom. I feel that if anything should go wrong again I could handle it with strength and courage.
You know, some people go through hell and they feel that if anything is to happen again they could not handle it. They fear the unknown, always looking out for that something. I don't!
I have been through sickness and surgeries, sexual violation, depression, heartbreak and so much more…but I have never been stronger.
I have come to the conclusion that I am a phoenix. This is a mythological bird that lives for hundreds of years and would reincarnate itself through flames, after each life cycle. I feel that my world has been filled with fire and each time I come out stronger like the Phoenix!